Motorcycle Flame Decals

Two bikers rode into a gas station in Indiana for a fill-up, because they heard about a contest being offered by the station to patrons who purchased a full tank of gas. When they went inside to pay, the men asked the attendant about the contest. "If you win, you're entitled to free sex" said the attendant. "How do we enter?" asked one. "Well, I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 10, if you guess right, you win free sex." "OK. I guess 7," said the other rider. "Sorry, I was thinking of 8," replied the attendant. The next week, the two guys go back to the same station to get gas. When they went inside to pay, the one asked the attendant if the contest was still going on. "Sure," replied the attendant. "I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 10, if you guess right. You win free sex." "2" said the Harley rider. "Sorry, I was thinking of 3," replied the attendant. "Y'all come back soon and try again." As they walked back to their bikes, one said to the other, "You know, I'm beginning to think this contest is rigged." "No way," came the reply. "My wife won twice last week."	Bob woke up after the annual office Christmas party with a pounding headache, cotton-mouthed and utterly unable to recall the events of the preceding evening. After a trip to the bathroom, he made his way downstairs, where his wife put some coffee in front of him. "Louise," he moaned, "tell me what happened last night. Was it as bad as I think?" "Even worse," she said, her voice oozing scorn. "You made a complete ass of yourself. You succeeded in antagonizing the entire board of directors and you insulted the president of the company, right to his face." "He's an idiot," Bob said. "Piss on him!" "You did," came the reply. "And he fired you." "Well, screw him!" said Bob. "I did. You're back at work on Monday."

Want Some Ice Cream?? The middle-aged wife had just returned to the house on Saturday afternoon after a shopping trip. She was quite agitated, and proceeded to tell her husband about a certain shoe salesman who had been rude. It seems she was sitting down while he helped her try on various shoes, and happened to glance up and notice that she was not wearing any knickers under her dress. Without even thinking, he just blurted out, "If that thing was full of ice cream, I'd eat every bite." Well, she was understandably insulted, and now wanted to know what her husband was going to do about it. The husband just sat there, watching football on TV, and grunted. The wife became hysterical, and insisted on knowing why he didn't go down to the shop and punch the rude salesman right in the nose. "Well", the husband replied, "There are three reasons I won't punch that guy in the nose. First of all, you shouldn't have even been shopping for shoes, since you have a whole wardrobe full of them. Secondly, you have no business going shopping with no knickers on. But most of all, I'm not going to punch anyone who's big enough to eat that much ice cream!"

The middle-aged wife had just returned to the house on Saturday
afternoon after a shopping trip. She was quite agitated, and
proceeded to tell her husband about a certain shoe salesman who
had been rude.

It seems she was sitting down while he helped her try on various
shoes, and happened to glance up and notice that she was not
wearing any knickers under her dress. Without even thinking, he
just blurted out, "If that thing was full of ice cream, I'd eat
every bite."

Well, she was understandably insulted, and now wanted to know
what her husband was going to do about it.

The husband just sat there, watching football on TV, and grunted.
The wife became hysterical, and insisted on knowing why he didn't
go down to the shop and punch the rude salesman right in the nose.

"Well", the husband replied, "There are three reasons I won't punch
that guy in the nose. First of all, you shouldn't have even been
shopping for shoes, since you have a whole wardrobe full of them.
Secondly, you have no business going shopping with no knickers on.
But most of all, I'm not going to punch anyone who's big enough to
eat that much ice cream!"